President Trump Visits Iraq

The Trumpty Dumpty Report

President Cretin made a trip to Iraq. He brought with him boxes of MAGA leftover hats to give as Christmas gifts to soldiers in hopes that they will like him, while they are far away from their homes. He told the soldiers that he hopes to make Iraq a permanent U.S. military base, since it’s next to America’s thorny adversary—Iran.

    He was overheard saying, “I can build a fantastic Trump Tower Golf Resort right here in Iraq. Maybe I will buy the place. I can be king here. King Donald sounds great. I can teach Iraqi’s to play golf. I’ll build it on the Persian Gulf. Golf on the Gulf has a terrific sound to it. It will be BIG! What a HUGE slogan for the brochure. A really, really big resort. I will get the Saudis to pay for it. My latest BFF, MBS will love to have his own free mansion on the course. He can play everyday. His yacht will be docked at my pier. WOW! I am soooo smart.”

    What was later learned, President Cretin violated another law prohibiting the president from campaigning with active duty troops. Signing his name on his MAGA hats and passing them out is a violation of law, but Cretin never really cared about the rule of law at any time in his life.

    Trump has a belief he will be running for a second term. Let’s hope he will serve it in federal prison.