"They Will Revolt If I Get Impeached!"

The Trumpty Dumpty Report

    President Trump was overheard talking to Kellyanne, “They won’t let me get impeached. It's hard to impeach somebody who hasn't done anything wrong and who's created the greatest economy in the history of the country. I'm not concerned, no. I think that the people would revolt if that happened. There will be a revolt if they impeach me. Don’t you think Kellyannie?” “Mr. President, my name is Kellyanne. Not Kellyannie. Who will revolt?”

    THEY will revolt. The THEY theys.” “Who are the THEY theys, Mr. President?” “You know, the poorly educated. I love the poorly educated, and my faves, the White Nationalists. I gave them my kind of high-five by letting them know that I am a Nationalist. THEY will protect me and revolt. It will be the best revolt ever. They will all come and stay in my DC hotel. I’ll give them a discount on the room rates and free room service up to $100.00! That will be a great plan.” “Mr. President, that will be a violation of the foreign and domestic emoluments clause, which is illegal. That could be a reason for impeachment, as well as, collusion with Russians to get elected, obstruction of justice, witness intimidation, abuse of power, violation of the first and fourteenth amendments , unfaithfully executing laws, inciting violence, campaign finance violations for using your money during the campaign to payoff women you were screwing around with, lying to the special prosecutor, and carving your initials into the desk in the Oval Office.” "Number one, if wasn't a campaign contribution, if it were, it's only civil, and even if it's only civil, there was not violation based on what we did, OK?" "Mr. President, if you paid for it during the primary campaign, and out of your personal account, it can be seen as a violation of campaign finance laws. You need to stop listening to that idiot moron Guiliani. He doesn't know what he is talking about." "The stuff you are talking about is peanut stuff. I haven't heard this, but I can only tell you this--Hillary Clinton. Her husband got money, she paid money, why doesn't somebody talk about that?" "Mr. President, where are your facts? Where is your proof? What money are talking about? What did they do with the money you are talking about?" "I don't need facts or proof. Didn't you once say that alternative facts are all we need?" "Not when it comes to impeachment, Mr. President." "Look, they've been looking for two years about collusion. There's no collusion. I don't drive. I couldn't have crashed a car." "Mr. President, that is collision. Not collusion. That is what you say, Mr. President. We have to wait and see what Mueller comes up with. He may just prove that there was collusion. Collusion by your sons. The Trump Tower meeting." "Witch hunt! Witch hunt!"

    “Won’t they revolt?” “I’m not so sure, Mr. President. If Dancing With The Stars is on the television, I believe they will stay home. That show is more popular than you are. I do think that reruns of The Andy Griffith Show are more popular than you are, too.” “Don’t say that, Kellypollyanna!” “Excuse me, Mr. President, you forgot my name again. Do you need a cookie or Fish cracker? Ivanka won’t like how you are treating me, Mr. President.” “Okay, Okay, I’ll be good.”

(Read the reasons for impeachment here:)